What Parent/Teacher Conferences Can Teach Us About Funder Feedback
Last week we had an important fall rite of passage in our house: the start of fall break and annual parent/teacher conferences. Since my kids started school, this has turned into one of my favorite times of year. Hearing about my kids from people they spend their days with is equal parts funny and illuminating.
Naturally, I left those meetings beaming about my kids. From one child being recommended for a gifted program to another shattering his kindergarten teacher’s expectations, it was a beautiful experience for us as parents.
This time is so fun for me because I get to see another side of my kids. I know them at home, but we’re all a little different in an environment where we’re away from the safety of our routine. Knowing how they move through their day - and that they’re great friends as well as great students - fills my heart with pride.
Funders are a lot like teachers
That experience got me thinking about the grant world. Program officers and reviewers see our organizations in a setting we don’t control. They meet us through an application, a site visit, or a short call, and they form impressions we may never hear unless we ask.
Just like a teacher’s view of a child, a funder’s view is partial. It’s not the whole picture, but it can reveal things we’re too close to see ourselves.
Why we skip the conference
Most organizations don’t treat funder feedback as a conversation worth having. After a decline, the instinct is to move on to the next deadline. After an award, the instinct is to exhale and get to work. Both responses are understandable, and both leave useful information on the table.
How to get the most out of the conversation
Ask, and check the rules first. Some funders are open to sharing feedback and others don’t offer it, so look at their guidelines before reaching out. If feedback is welcome, send a brief, gracious note after the decision asking whether they’d be willing to share a few thoughts, by email or in a short call.
Come with good questions. Open questions work better than defensive ones. A few to consider:
What stood out most in our proposal?
Was there anything that felt unclear or that you wanted to understand better?
How did our request line up with what you hoped to fund this cycle?
Would you welcome a future submission from us, and is there a timeline we should keep in mind?
Listen without arguing. The goal isn’t to change the decision. It’s to learn. Thank them, take notes, and save your reactions for later.
Look for patterns, not verdicts. One reviewer’s comment is one perspective. If several funders get confused by the same section, that’s a signal. If a single comment seems off base, it may simply reflect that reviewer’s priorities.
Notice communication gaps. Sometimes feedback reveals that something we consider obvious isn’t on the page. That isn’t a flaw in the program. It’s an opportunity to tell the story more clearly.
Close the loop. Share what you learned with your team, update your narrative language and funder records, and thank the funder for their time. A thoughtful follow-up can strengthen the relationship, and relationships are what carry funding forward.
Don’t wait for a “no”
Feedback after an award is just as valuable. Asking what resonated tells you what to carry into your next proposal and your next conversation with that funder.
Back to the conference table
The best parent/teacher conferences leave us proud and a little better informed. Funder conversations can do the same. They remind us that the people on the other side of the table are looking closely at our work, and that talking with them, rather than just submitting to them, makes our work stronger.
If you’d like support building funder relationships or strengthening your next proposal, drop Team Kat & Mouse a line for a free consultation.
